How to Dance at the Prom

Guide Note: The prom. It's the granddaddy of all high school events, and it can strike fear in the hearts of those with two left feet. Fortunately, there's not much to getting by on the dance floor. The two kinds of dancing you'll encounter at the prom, fast and slow, are less learned skills than they are exercises in finding the beat and having a good time.

How to Dance at the Prom will lay down a few simple rules to help you navigate the dance floor and the etiquette that surrounds it.

Table of Contents:

Introduction

(Creative Commons photo by Christopher Vasquez)
(Creative Commons photo by Christopher Vasquez)
  • You made it. You got the date. You pulled the ensemble together. Mom and dad have snapped their pics and shed their tears. But, you've still got work to do. It's showtime in America, and this is your prom.
  • As if the anxiety of getting there wasn't enough, now you've got to bust a move, make it through the sweaty-palmed slow dances and hope your prom is half as memorable as the ones in John Hughes' movies.
  • If you're not a natural dancer, the idea of actually going to the prom may send you running for the hills, looking for the other asocial kids with two left feet. Don't worry. Dancing, slow or fast, isn't nearly as hard as it looks, and surprise, surprise, it can actually be fun. This guide will walk you through the finer points of fast and slow dancing without alarming the chaperones.

General Prom Dancing Etiquette and Tips

(Creative Commons photo by Christopher Vasquez)
(Creative Commons photo by Christopher Vasquez)
  • The actual dancing is the easy part. Navigating all the social and romantic expectations that go along with the dancing is a bit trickier. Fortunately, there are a few nuggets of advice that, when taken to heart, can help assure that your prom is one to remember for all the right reasons:
  • Everybody is Worried about Themselves.
  • The trick to getting by on the dance floor is not being self-conscious. If you look like you're having a good time, you're aces. The problem, of course, is that feeling self-conscious and being, say, 17 go hand and hand. The trick to getting over this is to remember that 98% of the time people are more worried about themselves than they are about you and your dance moves (or lack thereof).
  • Be Considerate of Your Date.
  • If you and your sweetie are attached at the hip and plan on staring into each other's eyes all night, well, good for you. For everyone who gets a little ill thinking about those people, this advice is for you. It's all too easy for someone to get his or her feelings hurt at the prom. Be considerate of your date. There's no rule saying you have to be with each other all night, dance every dance together, etc. If you're not a big dancer, let your date know that it's cool if he or she wants to dance with other folks. If you're the more social one, don't abandon your date. Check in, communicate and be sympathetic to your date's feelings.
  • It's One Night.
  • Since every movie and television show in the world has conspired to tell you that the prom is supposed to be the most important night in your teenage life, you've probably got a ton of anxiety going into it. The social pressure to make this night hugely memorable pretty much guarantees its mediocrity. The minute you realize that this is just one night and that it's actually supposed to be kinda fun is the minute you'll start having a truly great time.
  • Get a Room.
  • Since the beginning of time, school administrators have had heart attacks over the latest version of freak dancing sweeping our nation. While much of their consternation is a time-honored tradition of adult breakdowns over teenage sexuality, there's no need to court a restraining order by humping your date on the dance floor. Seriously, reserve the Girls Gone Wild-style grinding for your stint on Real World XXXIII.
  • Don't Drink.
  • It's illegal. You're underage. You're at a school function. All good reasons not to be drinking. Want another one? You will make an ass of yourself on the dance floor. You want your prom night to be memorable; just don't make it memorable by throwing up on your date.

Fast Dancing

(Creative Commons photo by good-god-guy)
(Creative Commons photo by good-god-guy)
  • There are only two kinds of dancing in prom land—fast dancing and slow dancing. Fast dancing is probably the easier of the two because it's primarily about having a good time with your friends, but it does require a sense of rhythm and a modicum of confidence. Fortunately, there are a few tips that can put you at ease even if you've never danced outside the comfort of your own bedroom before:
  1. Relax: Scout the place out. Chat with your friends. Soak in the atmosphere. The dance floor will be there when you're ready.
  2. Take in Your Surroundings: Watch the dance floor for a bit. Get a sense of how other people are dancing.
  3. Feel the Beat: Listen to the music. Find the beat. Maybe do a little chair dancing. Bob your head. Let your body start to sway. When you hear a song you like, it's time to get on the floor.
  4. Step onto the Dance Floor: You're chill. You're into the groove. Now is the time to find a space on the dance floor. Don't invade anyone else's space. Just carve yourself out a little niche. If you're nervous about dancing, take some friends with you. You can form a little circle or, if it's just you and your date, dance facing each other.
  5. Do a Basic Step: You don't need to have "moves" to enjoy dancing. Your body simply swaying to the beat is dancing. If you want to take things a step beyond head-nodding, try a simple, rhythmic step.
    • Stand with your feet together.
    • Step with your right foot out to the right. Bring it back in.
    • Step with your left foot out to the left. Bring it back in.
    • You can repeat this step to the side, the front and on the diagonal.
  6. Relax Your Arms and Upper Body: You shouldn't flail your arms around, but you should let your upper body relax and follow the music's rhythm.
  7. Smile: You don't need to look like a crazy person, but you should look like you're having a good time. Nobody makes fun of somebody on a dance floor because they don't have fancy moves. They make fun of them because they look stiff, are being inconsiderate or are generally trying too hard. Stay relaxed and positive, and you won't have that problem.


Throwing in Some Moves

  • Once you're comfortable moving on the dance floor, you might consider busting out some more rehearsed moves. So long as you stay on the beat, appear relaxed and don't try anything too showy or athletic, you should be fine. Here are some ways to integrate actual steps into your dance floor repertoire:
  1. Imitate Others: Look at the really great dancers on the floor. Steal one or two of their moves.
  2. Watch Videos: You can pick up new moves by watching music videos online. There are even some YouTube instructional videos that break down the choreography you see in music videos. You shouldn't do an entire choreographed routine unless that's your thing, but you can always borrow a few of JT's latest steps.
  3. Take a Class: You can't take "dancing at the prom" classes, but most gyms offer some kind of hip-hop dance class.
  4. Practice at Home: Put on your headphones and dance around the house. You'll be less self-conscious goofing around at home and may discover moves you didn't even know you had.

Slow Dancing

(Creative Commons photo by Susanica Tam)
(Creative Commons photo by Susanica Tam)
  • This is where your prom gets really memorable or goes completely off the emotional rails. It's time for the slow dance. Continue to breathe. You'll get through it, sweaty palms and all.
  1. Assume the Position: Girls put their hands on their partner's shoulders or around their partner's neck. Guys put their hands around their partner's waist or on their hips.
  2. Sway to the Beat: Slow dancing on a crowded dance floor actually isn't much of a challenge. Just like fast music, there's a beat. You follow it, normally by swaying side to side or slowly turning in a circle.
  3. Have a Sense of Humor: It never hurts to cut the tension with a goofy dip or unexpected twirl. if you're not having an intense, romantic moment, this is also a good time to talk to your date. It may help put him or her at ease.
  4. Don't Overstep Your Boundaries: Don't make your partner feel uncomfortable by standing too close or touching anything you shouldn't be touching on a dance floor. Even if the groping opportunity is ripe, you may want to save it for a more private venue.
  5. Be Polite: Even if your date spent most of his or her time stepping on your toes, thank him or her for the dance. It's an old-fashioned gesture, but it's worth doing. It's a mind-numbingly parental thing to say, but don't take your dance partner, your friends or this moment for granted. It's, as they say, once in a lifetime.

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